My expectations coming into the College Park Arts program were that there would be less busy work and more substantial exploration and growth within our crafts and, eventually, our various capstone projects. However, upon entering the College Park Scholars program as an Arts Scholar, I was met with the realization that my program would not be exactly what I had hoped for and imagined. Initially, I had interest in trying out different mediums, themes, and objectives for the purpose of, like I said, exploring myself as an artist and exploring potential paths for my capstone project. Instead, I feel as though we were greeted with a small fraction of colloquium and workshop sessions that genuinely fanned the flames of inspiration and creativity in me. A distinct example that will forever resonate with me is when Mamela Nyamza, a dancer and activist that hails from South Africa, graced Clarice Performing Arts Center’s stage and told a story that many African women can identify with and relate to - one of pain, rejection, oppression, resistance, strength, and triumph.

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Throughout my experience as an Arts Scholar, I experienced a lot of disappointment, discouragement, and quite frankly, depression. In all honesty, these emotions and sentiments were not exclusive to my involvement in College Park Scholars.

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After reflecting on my first two years at the illustrious University of Maryland, College Park, I have come to the conclusion that in order to be successful as a student, student leader, sister, daughter, friend, and business woman, I need to seek God first. In order for me to actually bloom where I am planted, just like the title of my capstone project, I have to be centered - with my seeds planted and watered properly, with care. When I failed to seek God first, then care for myself second, so that I can for others third, I self-destructed, broke down, burnt out, and checked out in every aspect humanly possible. Between mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health, I was failing myself, abandoning ship, and pouring out so much that I was left empty. Overall, I have learned that you cannot pour from an empty cup, and for a large portion of my two years my College Park Scholars program I was trying to pour from an empty cup.

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Whether it was my capstone project specifically - or my credit hours towards my graduation audit that will be complete in God's timing, my social life, my professional career aspirations - I came to the realization that I was consistently trying to pour from an empty cup and that became a central theme of my project. An unfortunately overwhelming amount of the Diaspora’s most creative, artistic, and world-changing innovators, pioneers, artists, trailblazers, activists, and champions have poured their entire life and talent out at an unreal cost. Many of them, with Dorothy Dandridge serving as a major example, passed under unfortunate circumstances and under the pressure of being young, black, and gifted in a world that hates anything or anyone remotely young, black, or gifted.

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My capstone project was initially geared towards an outcome of seven portraits of seven unsung, unappreciated, and underrepresented black heroes that excelled and transcended their respective fields or industries that include but aren’t limited to visual art, entertainment, political and social activism, and public leadership. In addition, I had set my sights on completing seven biographies that would accompany the seven portraits, continuing my volunteering with Do Better at their Freedom School in Southeast, D.C., designing and launching my website in regards to my marketing work, rebranding and re-envisioning my art and marketing, and expanding my network.

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In my supporting courses thus far, I had learned an invaluable amount of information in regards to the Black Diaspora as a whole and its literal, statistically-sound genetic diversity that trumps all other continents or demographics. I also learned an incredible amount about pop culture, representation, visibility, intersectionality, and people of African descent’s overall will to not only survive but win. By taking AASP202, or “Black Culture in the United States” and ARTT150, or “Introduction to Art Theory”, I learned more about the thought, planning, and execution process that goes into bringing art, but black art particularly, to life for a purpose. Black art has always been and will always be intentional, deliberate, and innovative because that is the space and purpose that it must occupy in order for black people, as a rich people with a rich history and culture, to survive and prevail.

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As a student and artist that firmly believes that “an artist’s duty… is to reflect the times in which we live”, as Grammy-nominated singer, songwriter, and entertainer Nina Simone once famously said, I only grew into that belief during my time as a College Park Arts Scholar. Miss Simone followed up her statement with the declaration that she thought “that was true of painters, sculptors, poets, musicians”. ”As far as I’m concerned, it’s their choice, but I CHOOSE to reflect the times and situations in which I find myself. That, to me, is my duty. And at this crucial time in our lives, when everything is desperate, when everyday is a matter of survival, I don’t think you can help but be involved. Young people, black and white, know this. That’s why they’re so involved in politics. We will shape and mold this country or it will not be molded and shaped at all anymore”, Simone fearlessly added. As a young Nigerian-American artist who is still trying to wade in the water, go with the flow, and find my footing in a world that is heavily characterized by chaos and choices, I took her statements that back many years ago is a call to action more than anything. This quote has driven and inspired the way that I have moved in general, but particularly in the conversation of my craft; which is, largely, with a purpose.

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While N.W.A.D. is a culmination of my growth and journey as a creative throughout my adolescent years, it is especially influenced by my College Park Arts Scholar capstone project. In spite of all my wins and losses throughout my undergrad experience at the University of Maryland, College Park, I am confident that I wouldn't be the creative/artist that I am today without Scholars. Special shoutout to Mr. Brent Hernandez, Miss Anne Reese Carswell (+all Nyumburu Cultural Center faculty and staff), Dr. George Kintiba,

Prof. Renina Jarmon, Prof. Vusi Vladimini, Dr. Sangeetha Madhavan, and AASD Faculty Advisor

Marshal F. Washington for always supporting me during such a critical time in my life and teaching me in ways that have inspired my work forever.